Monthly Archives: February 2011

Monday Mornings

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February 28, 2011

Monday Morning is as welcome as a Las Vegan harlot at your Sunday wedding; a dirty remnant of a stag weekend gone haywire after 17 too many tequila chasers who decides to make an appearance to re-enact the hotel room debacle carried out a week earlier. Your imminent bride doesn’t take kindly to proceedings...
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Taking the blame for Milli Vanilli

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February 20, 2011
Taking the blame for Milli Vanilli

The closing stages of the 1980′s were famous for the tearing down of The Berlin Wall and Milli Vanilli. That they were both created in Germany is the only similarity that they share. In the 21 years which have passed since the un-masking of the damned, many things have been written, many irrelevant top...
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What is Take The Blame?

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February 17, 2011
What is Take The Blame?

Our ethos is simple, we are here to take the blame. Apparently we live in a blame culture; and in a blame culture there needs to be someone who you can turn to when there is nobody else who will shoulder your blame. Whatever the reason, whatever the occasion, we are there for you....
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Barclay’s announces £6.07bn profit a week after £200m is pledged to The Big Society

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February 15, 2011
Barclay’s announces £6.07bn profit a week after £200m is pledged to The Big Society

Barclay’s  Bank has announced pre-tax profits of £6.07 billion pounds and is soon to be followed by the remaining top 5 banks of The UK – HSBC, Lloyds, Royal Bank of Scotland and Standard Chartered – pushing the annual profit of the Big Five up to £15 billion. This comes just a week after...
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Valentine’s Day for single people

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February 14, 2011
Valentine’s Day for single people

Today is Valentine’s Day. At which point, over half the population groan. Obviously the exact figures are impossible to deduce but it is widely believed that at any one point in time around 54% of the human species is single and, well, hoping that February 15th can’t come a day too soon. And what...
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Scientists prove the bleeding obvious – Nuclear explosions really are not good for you

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February 11, 2011
Scientists prove the bleeding obvious – Nuclear explosions really are not good for you

At twenty three minutes past one on the morning of April 26th 1986 in a small Ukranian village by the name of Pripyat, all hell broke loose.  The ground literally welled up in a garguantuan fireball and the little red skinned, horned bastard himself said hello. An initial power surge in the main reactor...
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Supermarket rage is all the rage – We take the blame™ for supermarkets

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February 10, 2011
Supermarket rage is all the rage – We take the blame™ for supermarkets

The supermarket. Barren wasteland of the surreal and inept; a breeding ground of agitation and reckless stupidity; of time wasting and time expansion, where one fleeting second can feel like the eternal stretch of existence. Such is the capacity for the human being to be inept in a supermarket – the same capacity can...
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Christina Aguilera forgets the words in front of a billion people

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February 7, 2011
Christina Aguilera forgets the words in front of a billion people

Lets be honest. American football is an anomaly. So is Christine Aguilera. So many things are wrong with this combination of characters that apologising for all of them would be more difficult than explaining the rules of American football to an, as yet to be discovered, Amazonian tribe and then, having explained the rules...
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Behaviour