Monday Mornings

February 28, 2011

Monday Morning is as welcome as a Las Vegan harlot at your Sunday wedding; a dirty remnant of a stag weekend gone haywire after 17 too many tequila chasers who decides to make an appearance to re-enact the hotel room debacle carried out a week earlier. Your imminent bride doesn’t take kindly to proceedings and before you know it you are back snorting cocaine off of Miss America’s double d’s. That, or the Sunday afternoon stroll along a gentle, meandering canal towpath in the countryside quickly melts into a jay-walking marathon on The Shibuya intersection during a traffic-light breakdown as 8 million people try and escape as Godzilla pummels downtown Tokyo to rubble.

The inevitable evaporation of the weekend into the cold reality of a rainy Monday morning; the prospect of spending the next 5 days cocooned in your work chair staring at the whirling numbers and words on a shiny computer screen is something that has faced, and will continue to face, mankind for thousands of years. It’s about time somebody took the blame for the sheer lunacy and downright inconvenience of this most trivial of days.

On January 29th 1979, ground zero of Monday mornings, Brenda Spencer leant out of her window, shot dead 2 people, injured 11 and inspired Bob Geldof to write the above song, immortalising her ‘I don’t like Mondays‘ excuse in the process. Since then the malaise of a finished weekend has dominoed into societal angst. A recent study by the mental health charity Mind has unearthed that during 2009 20% of the workforce claimed they were ill due to Monday morning stress at work, 8% of the population actually left their job owing to stress. The number of prescriptions for anti-depressants stood at 39.1 million for 2009, a quarter of people implicated stress as affecting their relationships and 1 in 4 people actually cried at work due to the stress, mostly/probably/perhaps, brought on by Monday mornings.


Stop lamenting the existence of Monday morning, it’s going to happen once every 7 days. And when it does and the Monday blues start to pang, rest assured, we have taken the blame for it.

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One Response to Monday Mornings

  1. Take The Blame on March 4, 2011 at 11:20 pm

    Everybody must really like Monday Mornings???

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