Man robs bank then goes next door for pizza. Gets arrested.

October 10, 2011

The targeted bank was Wells Fargo. They don't make pizza so the robber went next door

Yuma. Tuscon Arizona. A Breeding ground of inept criminals where robbing a bank is followed up with a few beers and a celebratory slice of pizza. But of course. It wouldn’t be so many chromosomes short of a functioning string of DNA if the pizza restaurant chosen wasn’t next door to the bank.

Saturday in Tuscon and the thermometer is pushing 125 degrees and the temperature is playing havoc with Henry Elmers brain. The 56-year old father of ineptitude walked into a branch of Wells Fargo just after midday brandishing a knife. First mistake was in the choice of bank, or more accurately, its location: opposite the Police Department Headquarters.

On entering the bank Elmer threatened the staff and, pretty much nothing like Butch Cassidy and/or the Sundance Kid, left carrying a probably quite small sum of money. Rather than making a speedy getaway, or even a getaway – slow, fast or otherwise – Henry Elmer walked straight into the neighbouring Village Inn Pizza Parlour and ordered a beer and some pizza and waited for the police to arrive to arrest him.

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