Food

Man robs bank then goes next door for pizza. Gets arrested.

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October 10, 2011
The targeted bank was Wells Fargo. They don't make pizza so the robber went next door

Yuma. Tuscon Arizona. A Breeding ground of inept criminals where robbing a bank is followed up with a few beers and a celebratory slice of pizza. But of course. It wouldn’t be so many chromosomes short of a functioning string of DNA if the pizza restaurant chosen wasn’t next door to the bank. Saturday...
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Vegetable hunt gathers steam as E. coli hits the United States. Bean sprouts now to blame.

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June 7, 2011
Vegetable hunt gathers steam as E. coli hits the United States. Bean sprouts now to blame.

Bean sprouts are potentially the most dangerous food in the known universe and possibly the cause of 21 deaths and thousands of hospitalisations across Europe. The problem is that they also might not be. Any vegetable currently lining the shelves of your local supermarket could be the E. coli killer stalking the plates of...
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Breaking Blame™ Germany admits that Spanish cucumbers are not to blame.

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June 1, 2011
Breaking Blame™ Germany admits that Spanish cucumbers are not to blame.

Germany has admitted that Spanish cucumbers are not the source of the E. coli outbreak that has killed 16 and left hundreds ill across Germany and parts of Europe. Just what the fuck is causing the contamination? Bin Laden in vegetable terrorism? Europe’s children – they have finally had enough of being forced to...
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Cucumber-Gate. Spain refutes blame as attack of the killer cucumbers continues.

1
June 1, 2011
Cucumber-Gate. Spain refutes blame as attack of the killer cucumbers continues.

The economice fall-out from the cucumber deaths sweeping across Europe is costing Spain upwards of 200 million dollars a week as the country seeks to refute blame for the outbreak. As the number of deaths and people infected continues to grow, the largest part of the Iberian Peninsula is engaged in a war of...
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Cucumbers continue their killing spree in Europe. E-coli to blame for multiple victims.

3
May 30, 2011
Cucumbers continue their killing spree in Europe. E-coli to blame for multiple victims.

Killer salads are stalking the dinner tables of Europe and E-coli is to blame. So far 10 unfortunate people have lost their lives in Germany, hundreds have fallen ill and the outbreak is far from over, barely contained and little understood. Thought to have originated in Spanish cucumbers imported into Germany, the E-coli cucumber...
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Denmark Bans Marmite. (Danish Bacon bans to follow in retaliation?)

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May 25, 2011
Denmark Bans Marmite. (Danish Bacon bans to follow in retaliation?)

Denmark has only gone and imposed a nationwide ban on Marmite. If you love Marmite, just let that little sentence sink in for a while…………….. And then thank the Lord above that you don’t live in Copenhagen where shops have already been ordered to withdraw stocks of the bizarre, alien substance from the shelves....
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Termites Chow down on dollars in Indian Bank. Bill comes to 10 million rupees.

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April 27, 2011
Termites Chow down on dollars in Indian Bank. Bill comes to 10 million rupees.

“Ocean’s Eleven, Butch Cassidy and the Sundance kid, Reservoir Dogs, Nick Leeson. Listen up. If you want to rob a bank, what you need to do is eat the f**king money. “ anon Build your house on the beach and it will get washed away. Build your bank on a termite mound and the...
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£14 billion UK food mountain gets wasted every year.

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April 12, 2011
£14 billion UK food mountain gets wasted every year.

Hey you. Yeah you. How much food did you throw away yesterday? last week? How about last year? What about just at lunch time today? Well we can tell you how much food you throw away. Not in literal terms. We can’t tell you what you jettison, be it corn fakes or bacon, marmalade...
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15-month toddler given apple margarita in American restaurant. Would have failed breathalyser.

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April 11, 2011
15-month toddler given apple margarita in American restaurant. Would have failed breathalyser.

Ineptitude comes to the restaurants of America as a Michigan chain restaurant Applebee’s gives a 15-month old child who requested apple juice a margarita instead. If only such things would happen to the adults of this world. A Friday afternoon stop at the Applebee’s restaurant turned into a drunken, terrifying ordeal for Taylor Dill-Reese...
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Breast milk ice-cream

2
March 2, 2011
Breast milk ice-cream

There are some things that the world could quite easily live without; certain things that, were they to vanish, nobody would blink. Places, people and objects that really have no place in this world or the next. Switzerland for example. Bono. Big Brother. Ships in bottles. Cucumbers. Rollerblades. Traffic wardens. Touching your nose with...
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What is Take The Blame?

1
February 17, 2011
What is Take The Blame?

Our ethos is simple, we are here to take the blame. Apparently we live in a blame culture; and in a blame culture there needs to be someone who you can turn to when there is nobody else who will shoulder your blame. Whatever the reason, whatever the occasion, we are there for you....
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Obesity is “inevitable” according to diet experts. Get used to it. Be fat. Celebrate.

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July 4, 2008
Obesity is “inevitable” according to diet experts. Get used to it. Be fat. Celebrate.

Obesity is officially no longer the individuals fault. The person eating all the food, doing no exercise, lazing in a rocking chair drinking Dr Pepper and guzzling down Doritos faster than an Olympic athlete injects nandroline is now no longer to blame. According to a “report” released into the wild today and compiled by...
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Behaviour